Heartless Bastard
by Yumi Night
Summary: A letter was sent to Kai from his secret admirer. The only thing is, what you see isn't always what you get. Please read and review!


**Disclaimers:**The characters do not belong to me. I claim ownership only over my own characters. Thank you!

_Author's Notes:_ This is a short story about Kai. I was just contemplating how he'd feel given the situation and amused myself with it to the point of making this story. Without further a due, read, review, and by all means enjoy!

                                                              _Heartless Bastard_

_                                                               By: Yumi Night_

_                                                          ~_~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Kai, I hate you. I really do. I don't care that it's unfair. I don't even want to listen to you anymore. It sickens me when I see people look at you. I am even more sickened when I see myself look at you. I'll admit solemnly to one fact though, I loved you from even the first time I saw you.

When I first laid eyes on you was my dreadful mistake. I shouldn't have done it. Because…I'll admit, to this very day, the image of your smile, frowns, scowls, smirks…are all in my head. Up till this very day. No matter how hard I try to forget it, it won't let me. Just as I know YOU wouldn't. 

Oh how you wouldn't. Wouldn't free me from this inhumane torture of longing. Longing to see your face every day. I hate it. It just reminds me of how much I hate you…and love you just the same.

What am I saying? Love? You would not know of even what it meant. You always reminded me of the hatred you felt for me, not the love. Never the love. You wouldn't even admit this to yourself.

You are just a selfish bastard. A heartless backstabbing hell of a bastard. I can say as much as that. For all I know, you might be cursing me right now. In that logical head of yours. I'll bet no ones ever dared to say this to your face. I'll bet you made sure they'd never think of hating you. Or maybe you have? It just shows how cold-hearted a devil you are.

I wanted to stop this feeling of love. I hated it. It was like poison. Spreading slowly through out my body until I couldn't stand it anymore. I wanted to stop this torture, so I came to you. I wanted so much to slap the smirk of that handsome face.                                        

Imagine my surprise when I told you just that with one stare. And gods of all gods, you _laughed!_ You mocked this love I felt and walked away. From that time on, I hated you. Hated you from the very bone. From the deepest reaches of my soul.

Let's face it! You earned this! You wanted me to hate you. Even if you knew I'd never be able to do it. 

That's when you decide to make your move, wasn't that right. You smoldered me with lots of your pretended affections and toyed with my feelings to your wicked heart's content. 

"Let's be together forever." You said to me ever so endearingly one night. I remember that at least, you deceitful little bastard. I had believed it then. I was so naïve. Naïve enough to have fallen for that old trick. You had me then, didn't you? Thought you had me eating at the palm of your hand? Wrong. 

Surprised? The great and mighty Kai, wrong? I'm mistaken aren't I? I'm mad you say? Insane to the most? I could have laughed. I wish I could see the look on your perfect face right now. 

Oh, and by the way, don't skip the part you ditched me. Please. Flatter yourself with how easily I was caught by you. And also how easily you forgot about me.

You left me, Kai. Left me with your tyrant grandfather whose only purpose in life seemed to be too entirely preoccupied with my personal torture. Still, you didn't care. You left me in his care anyway. Oh how I loathe you…

After your pretended struggle to leave me then, I remember. That's right. I **do** remember that time. Even if we were only four years old then. You left me for that abbey in Russia, leaving me alone with YOUR grandfather who I had to live with. But I already told you about that part.

Ten years later, here you come into the scene. I tried to talk to you during the tournaments. Tried to ask what had really happened to you. I tried to warn you how much your grandfather had changed. That he no longer deserved your love. What did you do to me then? You ignored me. Told me to leave you be. Even if I did then, I never would have believed you'd forgotten me. Us. How could you? You heartless bastard. 

I returned while you were alone in the lockers, getting ready to do battle. I hadn't realized then that you had changed too. Just like Lord Hiwatari had. I tried to ask you why you were treating me as if you didn't know me. You didn't even care to reply. You just stared into my face like I was some kind of spectacle. That took the cake, Kai. That's when I finally realized you HAD forgotten me. 

This realization made me numb with pain. You could have slapped me and it would have hurt a whole lot less. That's just a glimpse of what you had done to me. Of how much you destroyed me with your aloofness.

That is why I must now forget you too. No matter how much it hurts me to do so. I will forget you. 

Yes, forget you. Forget all the laughs we shared as kids. Forget how we used to bicker over who would get to read the comic book first. Argued endlessly on who would crush the other's blade. Also of how we used to snuggle together in your bed whenever there was a storm and how much you stood up for me when the other kids were making fun of me. I miss you Kai. I don't want to forget. Even if you have.

I don't want to talk about this anymore, for I don't want to drown you in all my sorrows. Just know, Kai, you will forever hold a special place in my empty heart. I love you.

                                                                          ~~~~~~~~~~~

Kai let out a lazy smile as he carefully tore the note into separate sheets. He let it drift to the floor, but one piece caught his eye. Gingerly, he bent down and retrieved the small torn sheet of white stationary. He looked at the three words at the end of the letter and his eyes softened for the first time in so long. 

"I love you too, honey." He whispered as he held it to his heart with a clenched fist.

                                                                   OWARI

                                                                       ***

A/N: How was that? Pretty sad, I guess. I actually dreamt about seeing this. -_- Weird no? Look at it this way. Imagine the one who wrote the letter to Kai as your personal OC (Original Character). It would be kinda fun that way. Ok, then! Please review and comment on this. Thank you for reading! See you in my other fics! ^-^    


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